I Love My Job

I really, really do. It's one of the few jobs I can think of that doesn't take a degree in rocket science and still keeps you on your toes, where you learn something new every single day. Mostly I love this job for what are considered "bloopers," sometimes caught by the person dictating and sometimes not. I've been doing this type of job for, oh, the past 19 years in different fields, predominantly medical and legal (and often the two go hand-in-hand). You can't help but giggle when you hear someone cussing in the background or even right into the microphone. You have to literally laugh out loud when you hear them say something completely off the wall and unexpected, realize what they've said, and then follow it up with "Oh, shit, take that out." Sometimes you have to shake your head in disbelief that someone would say something so blatantly hilarious without having that intention.

A few of my favorite snippets from the years have included:

• "She was struck with another cheerleader while at cheerleader camp." (How the hell do you strike someone with a cheerleader?)
• "The patient's sister died at age 100 of unknown causes." (I would guess OLD AGE or NATURAL CAUSES, but anyhow).
• "He is just so arrogant, it is hard to believe him." (ROFL)
• "He/she complains of [...]. She/he has been having symptoms of [...]. He/she will undergo [...]" (referring to a trans-gendered patient in the process of sex change - ummm, I think I would have settled on the sex the patient was converting to, rather than "he/she")
• "The patient complains he smells bad...Wait, no, that's not right...The patient complains his sense of smell is bad." (Do we really wanna go there?)
• "Ah, shit, I don't know what I'm saying. Just make me sound good." (Sometimes easier said than done, but I love ya anyhow)
  
• "Angie, you know what the hell I'm saying, so just put it in there." (I get paid to mind read now, too? Where's the frigging bonus check?)