In a Morbid Kind of Way, It's Kind of Amusing

$750 and much trauma later, I've decided I prefer being toothless, even if it means never eating a good solid meal again in my life. Besides making me gag and puke, dentures have reminded me of something I hated about my own teeth, specifically the fact that I have quite the overbite - when my face was all sunken in you didn't really notice it but once again my top teeth are jutting out, begging to be teased by some asshole who thinks they're better than me just because their parents could afford an orthodontist. I'd forgotten about it but it's all coming back to me now.

I know it's only a matter of time, learning to get used to having something in my mouth that takes up so much space all at once, and that eventually I will train my mind to overcome this powerful gag reflex (lot of good to have no teeth when you have a hyperactive gag, huh? I know what many men say about toothless women. . .). I have yet to try to eat with them in, since I can't even handle my own secretions, let alone food. Yeah, when I'm not gagging and retching, I'm drooling. It's a pretty sight, for sure.

I have to wonder, though, how come my NAME is printed on them, both upper and lower plates? Is that so if they're lost and then found, they can be returned? So if I throw them away, they will magically reappear in their cup? Or just to make sure the lab didn't mix mine up with someone else's, but in which case, wouldn't a temporary tag have been sufficient instead of a permanent one? Do I just ask too many questions?

Excuse me for a moment while I go clean up my drool and spend a few moments gagging.