Being Oblique - Or Obtuse?

If someone is pissed off at {you} for doing something, is there some reason they can't just come right out and say it in as many words instead of leaving you wondering if they're talking about you or someone else?

Let's say I inadvertently piss "Joe" off. I want Joe to come to me and say, "Look, you did {this} and I didn't know you were doing it until after the fact, and what you did caused me a lot of inconvenience. Would you mind not doing it again, or at least letting me know your plans beforehand so I'm not slammed at the last minute?" That was pretty easy to understand and even when you're stressed, tact does not, in fact, have to run fleeing from the building - even with me. I'm not always obnoxious. I want to know if Joe's upset at something *I* did so I can try not to do it again, rather than being told in a vague way that "some people" did such-and-such or abused a privilege or just plain hurt someone's feelings or whatever. I can't help what "some people" do, since I can't control them, but I CAN control what I do and want to know when I've done something, if not necessarily wrong, at least irritating, especially if I'm not trying to be deliberately irritating.

I really CAN work and play well with others, honest!